Stephanie McMahon getting her some hot chocolate

Stephanie Getting Her Some Hot ChocolateA seductive, sarcastic comedy about one woman, one craving, and a dangerously misunderstood cup of cocoa.SCENE ONE — THE CRAVINGStephanie strutted into the kitchen at 11:47 p.m. wearing a silky robe, bedroom eyes, and the kind of expression that could make a security camera blush.She opened the refrigerator.Stared inside.Closed it.Opened it again.STEPHANIE: “Well, damn. I was hoping a six-foot-tall chocolate man might’ve magically appeared in here by now.”She sighed dramatically.“Of course not. The only thing in this refrigerator that knows how to disappoint me is the milk, and even that has the decency to expire before promising me forever.”She glanced toward the pantry.There it was.The hot chocolate.Her eyes narrowed.STEPHANIE: “Hello, handsome.”She picked up the container and examined it like a woman deciding whether a man deserved her phone number.“Rich, creamy, warm, and available after midnight. Finally, a man who meets the minimum requirements.”She grabbed a saucepan.“Unlike my last boyfriend, this one actually comes with instructions.”SCENE TWO — FOREPLAY WITH THE FROTHERStephanie poured the milk into the saucepan and turned on the stove.She leaned against the counter, watching the milk warm.STEPHANIE: “I like mine hot, smooth, and capable of keeping me up all night.”She paused.“I’m talking about chocolate, you filthy-minded little kitchen appliance.”The microwave beeped from across the room.Stephanie turned toward it.STEPHANIE: “Nobody asked you. You’re just a box that makes things hot. Don’t get cocky.”She reached for the cocoa powder, poured some into the mug, and added sugar.Then she took a tiny spoonful of chocolate powder and tasted it.Her eyes closed.STEPHANIE: “Oh, my goodness.”She opened one eye.“See? That’s what happens when you give a woman something sweet without asking her to explain her feelings first.”She began stirring.Slowly.Seductively.With the intensity of a woman who had been disappointed by humanity but refused to give up on dairy products.STEPHANIE: “Look at that swirl. Beautiful. Consistent. No mixed signals. No emotional baggage. Just chocolate going exactly where I tell it to go.”She stopped stirring.“Honestly, I should’ve bought a boyfriend at the grocery store. At least then I could’ve returned him if he didn’t work properly.”SCENE THREE — THE FIRST SIPThe hot chocolate was ready.Stephanie lifted the mug with both hands and brought it toward her lips.She took a careful sip.Silence.Then she leaned back against the counter, staring at the ceiling.STEPHANIE: “Sweet mercy.”She took another sip.“I haven’t felt this satisfied since the last time somebody canceled plans and I got the whole evening to myself.”She examined the mug.“You know what’s beautiful about this relationship? I don’t have to shave my legs, put on perfume, pretend I enjoy a three-hour conversation about somebody’s cryptocurrency investment, or listen to a man explain why his ex was crazy.”She took another sip.“And if I leave you sitting on the counter for two hours, you don’t text me, ‘So I guess we’re not talking anymore?’”Stephanie raised the mug in a toast.“To hot chocolate. The only thing in my life that gets better when I add marshmallows.”She popped a marshmallow into her mouth.Then another.Then she looked around to make sure nobody was watching.STEPHANIE: “What? They’re little pillows. I’m not emotionally cheating.”SCENE FOUR — THINGS GET COMPLICATEDStephanie carried her mug into the living room and settled onto the sofa.She took a sip.Then another.Her phone buzzed.A message from her ex appeared.Hey, beautiful. Been thinking about you.Stephanie stared at the screen.She glanced at her hot chocolate.Then back at the screen.STEPHANIE: “Oh, look. The human equivalent of room-temperature tap water has returned.”She typed a reply.I’m busy.Her ex responded almost immediately.Doing what?Stephanie looked at her mug with a wicked smile.STEPHANIE: “Doing somebody who actually knows how to treat me right.”She sent it.Three dots appeared.Then disappeared.Then appeared again.Stephanie laughed so hard she nearly spilled her drink.STEPHANIE: “Oh, now you’re speechless? Where was this energy when I asked you to communicate like a grown man?”She blocked his number.Took another sip.And whispered to the mug:“Baby, we’re exclusive.”FINAL SCENE — A WOMAN KNOWS WHAT SHE WANTSMidnight passed.The fireplace crackled. The lights glowed softly. Stephanie curled up beneath a blanket, holding the last of her hot chocolate.She looked toward the camera.STEPHANIE: “People say you can’t buy happiness.”She raised her mug.“Those people have clearly never visited the hot chocolate aisle.”She took the final sip, licked a little chocolate from her lip, and smiled.“And for the record, I’m not desperate.”A beat.“I’m selective.”Another beat.“And right now, my standards are approximately eight ounces of warm milk, two tablespoons of cocoa, and a man who doesn’t talk during my favorite show.”She set the empty mug down.Then she looked back at the camera with a devilish grin. STEPHANIE: “Tomorrow night, I’m getting myself some whipped cream.”She winked.“Let’s see how serious this relationship gets.”FADE TO BLACK.Coming soon: Stephanie and the Forbidden Chocolate Fountain.